joiedecombat: (frustrated)
Dear customer,

Please do not use the phrase "do the right thing" when what you mean is "do what I want." They are not synonymous, except in your head.

Thanks so,
[ profile] joiedecombat


Sep. 19th, 2007 03:58 pm
joiedecombat: (*gnaw*)
I do not care whether it says on the paper that there's an expiration date or not, common sense should indicate that after fourteen years, your gift certificates might not be valid any more, and that perhaps you should suck it up and use the next one in a more timely fashion instead of throwing a fit of entitlement.

Just sayin'.


Jun. 30th, 2007 03:41 pm
joiedecombat: (kill it with FIRE)
Two "oh my God, you must be joking" calls in a row!

First the woman who called in absolutely outraged because she is being penalized for excessive returns on her account - and by "excessive" I mean that in the past less than four years she'd actually charged less than five thousand dollars but somehow contrived to return more than eleven thousand, and had actually paid only a bit over eight hundred - and saying that she plans to sue the company because she was given a hard time over claiming a credit balance refund in the amount of $245 because she has made three returns but no purchases over the past twelve months...

...then the woman who came into a store with a statement dated 3/31/04 wanting to claim the credit balance it reflected, and who, when I advised her that it would have been refunded after three statements, persisted in asking questions about what she should do in order to be able to claim the credit. Which was $50.20. Somehow I managed not to tell her that what she should do is accept that after more than three years, that ship has pretty much sailed.

Plus a store associate giving a customer a stupidly hard time about trying to get him to look up her account number, and demanding that I give her whatever information I had because it was not part of his duties - never mind that only one of our lines is permitted to give out account numbers, and I only have the extension that the associates dial in to it, because it has to be an associate who calls in so that they can verify picture ID...

The world is full of assholes today.
joiedecombat: (bombarded)
"May I place you on hold to transfer your call?" is not a rhetorical question.

The clue to that was that I asked three times.
joiedecombat: (rage)
A brief note from a customer service phone monkey, to anyone who may ever need to call any kind of customer service for any reason:

If you find yourself needing to do business over the phone, or needing to call for customer service, please do everyone a favor and do not sit there eating while you are talking on the phone. Trust me, we can hear you. It sounds gross. Would you sit there chomping on nachos while doing business face-to-face at the bank? Stop it.

I'm not talking about coming back from placing a customer on hold and hearing eating noises, mind you; I'm talking about listening to them chewing while they are talking to me. And it never fails to baffle me. Why do that? Do they really think that because I can't see them, I can't tell?


Crossposted to [ profile] customers_suck
joiedecombat: (...)
Funny the things that'll send your mood spiraling into the toilet.

God, I hate people who get overly literal about polite pleasantries. Yes, yes, too bad I couldn't wave my magic wand and make a gift card magically appear in your hand, but I did offer to connect you to the store where you made your purchases so that they could correct whatever error was made and get your gift card to you. You declined. When I ask if there is anything else I can help you with, therefore, the correct answer is not to reply in a syrupy, patronising voice, "Did you help me with anything?"

Once again I'm left wondering why people seem to believe it's perfectly okay to say crap like that. I could hear "ha ha I have the moral high ground" oozing out of her voice.

A first!

Dec. 27th, 2006 05:08 pm
joiedecombat: (right upside the head!)
I just got called white trailer park trash by a customer.

I got called white trailer park trash something like five times.

And then she called me a bitch!

I hung up on her.

D: D: D:
joiedecombat: (bombarded)
I am about to start answering gift card help desk calls with "rocket science help desk." Because apparently that's what this is.

joiedecombat: (Rogue - Urge To Kill Rising)
Two questions for the day:

1) WTF is with today and people who are fundamentally incapable of grasping the concept of a monthly billing cycle? If you get a statement in the beginning of April that shows an amount due even though you thought you paid your account in full at the end of March, the time to ask "hey, what's with this remaining amount" is not a week after that statement's due date. And if you are dumb enough to wait until after your statement showed the amount was due to ask about it, you should not be surprised when we tell you that no, we cannot simply roll that amount due onto your next due date so that you will not be considered past due or receive any late fees or interest charges. People like this make me regret being able to waive late fees and interest charges.

Similarly, if you receive a statement in March showing that you have an amount due in April, and you do not make a payment, and then you receive another statement showing a) no payment received and b) a new payment due with a new due date, that does not mean that the previous amount is not now past due and that you should not receive a late fee so long as you make your payment by the new due date. This is not how it works.


2) On a lesser note, who told the Gundam SEED fandom that "what if Murrue was pregnant before Jachin Due?" was a good and interesting plotline? Stop it.

That is all.
joiedecombat: (Rogue: Mission Accomplished)
Black Friday: overhyped. Today was actually fairly normal, except for the fact that people kept bringing around cookies and we got free pizza and stuff. And I got a $30 Barnes & Noble gift card out of it. Woot!

The cats are adjusting. Sammy came out from behind the TV about the time I was going to bed last night and promptly hid under the sofa instead. I didn't actually see him until I got home for lunch today, but he's relaxing more now and is currently on the floor beside my desk, grooming.
joiedecombat: (Rogue: Mission Accomplished)
Playing X-Men Legends II before work, trying to retrieve Iron Man... more out of completism than out of any real desire to have Iron Man playable, because, really. All the scads and scads of X-Men characters, and they give us Iron Man? Come on, people. But in any case, Apocalypse has him stashed somewhere in an Egyptian pyramid... and inevitably, whenever I go into that area, Gambit wanders offscreen and gets himself knocked out somehow. He's triggering some kind of trap, but I can never see him do it, so I'm not sure where it is. I'm left with this mental image of Remy spotting some little golden statuette or something and, well...

Trying to crockpot-roast an alarming chunk of cow, per [ profile] salazen's instructions. Cow, meet crockpot. Crockpot, meet my dinner. Take good care of it, now.

Also, that issue at work I'd been working on since Friday and had waiting for me yesterday when I went in? I kicked its ass.

That is all.
joiedecombat: (Dyrk Magz - I Need An Adult)
Guess that Friend
You have a total of 52 friends
You requested to guess 52 entries.
3 were skipped due to invalid content (surprising?).
You made 49 guesses.
You got 49 correct.
Doing the math for you, that means you got 100% correct.


Damn, I do not want to go to work today. There's a whole situation waiting for me when I get there and I am not looking forward to it. Hopefully it didn't escalate much further over the weekend. Hopefully with a manager's help I can put it to bed quickly.

joiedecombat: (Dyrk Magz - Very Puzzled)
In which I make really oblique jokes using one of the icons [ profile] evilbeej gave me...

The weather seems to have abruptly realized that, oh hell, it's October! Because very suddenly it's gone autumnally chilly around here, when it was summery a day or two ago. Although I'm generally a big wimp about the cold, I do enjoy fall, when it's still chilly rather than cold. So this is kind of nice. It gives me an excuse to drink apple cider and hot cocoa and make Crock-Pot chili. Not that I've done any of the above just yet. But I will! Soon! I may also get ambitious later this month and carve a jack o'lantern, although my apartment is placed in a manner which leaves me not much of anywhere to put one.

This town apparently puts on a Halloween Event not too far from me. I wonder if it'd be worth going. Could be fun.

In other happy news, my Black Phoenix lab order has shipped. Anticipate much girly babbling about perfumes in the near future.

This week at work has been all about Customer Service Appreciation or, well, whatever this week is. Which is cool for me, what with randomly getting an extra half-hour tacked onto one of my breaks and getting to wear jeans all week and having people randomly come by my desk and give me food. Customers not appreciably less stupid than usual, unfortunately. Ditto store associates. I had a call today last over half an hour. wtf.

But on the whole, could be lots worse. Even if better hours would be nice. Maybe soon! know, I thought I had more to say. Guess not.
joiedecombat: (Economic Disaster)
No confirmed source of gasoline near my apartment + newspaper reports of shots fired over cutting in line at gas station = Abby is calling in to work again today. We'll see how it looks tomorrow.
joiedecombat: (go me)
Today was amusing, as most of the workday was eaten up by motivational speakers. The one who occupied our morning was especially good, and I am not just saying this because I got five dollars during his presentation for doing pushups in front of the class. He also gave one girl three dollars for jumping jacks, and one ten dollars for doing a very impressive Tarzan yodel that brought people over from other areas of the building to see what was going on.

Plus I got the most right on the little word puzzle thing he handed out, and was one of two people to get the correct solution to the problem of how to convert the roman numerals "IX" into a six using only one continuous pencil line. (Which, duh.)

I r smrt.

Then I got on the phones. It's not a fun job, but it doesn't suck like tech support, as there's not nearly as much diagnosis involved. It's mostly a matter of checking details, explaining things to the customers, and determining what I can do and what I can't do and explaining that to the customers. And it's still a pretty cool place to work. The speechifying today reminded me of just why I was so glad to get this job.

And I get paid tomorrow, so that's good.

Still having fun with icons, simple though most of them are.
joiedecombat: (Leon: Dot Dot Dot)
Odd dreams.

After at least one round of world-ending natural disaster plot dreams, I dreamed that, for some reason, Frank (my employer with State Farm) needed a hand and wanted me to come back and help for a day. For some reason, I agreed... but that morning I was running late, so I decided to take a plane, only realizing after I was in the air that a) the plane would land half an hour away and I'd be late anyhow, and b) I hadn't called in to Saks and, furthermore, had no idea how to do so, and therefore I'd shot myself in the foot for not one but two jobs.

Today I have an assessment (fancy word for "test") at work. Then we start taking real calls. Ahaha.
joiedecombat: (Leon: Dot Dot Dot)
First day of work! I am v. tired, mostly 'cause I didn't get enough sleep. Can't stay up until 12:30 again. Zzz. On the bright side, my apartment is nicely convenient to the Saks building, so I don't have to leave stupid early.

So far, so good. We went over policies and benefits packages and signed a bunch of paperwork. I'll be in training, standard 8 to 5 Monday through Friday, for the next two months, before my schedule gets wacky. And after this week, I'll be paid every Friday. Pretty cool.

I also get discounts all over the freaking place.

We'll see, but... so far, so good.
joiedecombat: (death)
When you know that the exit onto the smoker's patio is equipped with an ear-piercing alarm which goes off if the door is opened without an ID being scanned, or if the door stays open too long, FOR GOD'S SAKE CLOSE THE DOOR BEFORE WE ALL GO DEAF. That is all.
joiedecombat: (Bang)
Should I get a candy bar, or should I wait for real food when I get out of here at midnight?

Help me out here.
joiedecombat: (Default)
That talk that Frank wanted to have with me about the telephones turned out to involve a distressing pile of complaints he's apparently received about me. The ones that have particularly stuck in my mind are "Please don't make me talk to Abby again" and "sounds like a computer."

So, I suck and people hate me. Go me.

I know that this is not a job to which I am well-suited. I know that I am not a sparkling people person. I know, and some people on my frindslist can probably agree, that I am not really adept at talking on the phone.

But damn it, it's not like I'm not trying. I smile. I ask people how they're doing. If they call in to report an accident I ask if everyone's okay. I say please and thank you and you're welcome and I wish people a good day.

If it upsets people that I ask "who can I tell him is calling?" before I transfer them over to Frank - because he told me to because he likes to be able to greet them by name when he picks up - how is that my fault?

If I offend people this much when I'm trying to be as friendly and polite as I know how...

...ehn. I don't know. Crappy mood today. Maybe I'll feel better tomorrow.


joiedecombat: (Default)

August 2012

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